Aaah! It's been so long... and feels good to be back! :)
Well, there's a lot to catch up... I was getting married in a couple of months when I lost my job to a Business Unit shutdown, then got married and moved to Pune. All too quick that blurred the after-effects of each of these events individually only to kick-in once I kind of settled here.
My first focus was on... ugh no... not on learning to cook but prepare myself for interviews! Only, they never happened. I was unable to find any job opening matching my previous work profile and experience and no single interview call either.
With the new-bride hues and 'I'm married to an Army Man' pride fading, I was desperate to have something on my hands that adds value, brings satisfaction, provide a platform to make a difference and of course put a few rupees into my bank account.
Sure this is a super green, huge campus with so many facilities and sports complexes. You can walk/cycle around, play as many sports you like but hey, these are for helping you stay fit and keep yourself occupied. What I'm missing is something beyond...
The thoughts of moving to different places every 2-3 years, making new friends, find new jobs/ways to keep yourself occupied and feeling worthwhile have been very exciting same time last year.
Ask me now, and I'm battling the following:
1) My Friends - There are many women around, some seniors, some recently wed, few officers and few working. You meet, talk, attend/host parties but any emotional element that I was used to finding in friendships is so visibly absent. They don't cross the line of acquaintances to friends.
2) Sense of Accomplishment - Back then, I woke up each day with a desire to do better at work, meet deadlines, engage in learning new tools, etc. and see results in appraisals, product and all. I was a chip design engineer and when I saw the new chip arrive, knowing you have contributed in its making, which would go into a mobile to be used by someone filled us with so much pride.
3) Independence - Social and Financial Freedom seem bigger things after they ceased to exist. It began way back when I left the auto and started taking bus to school, later trains to and from college and home. I had been a fiercely independent one and thoroughly believed in self-sufficiency. I wasn't reckless but enjoyed my space and ability to glide through everything on my own.
Now in this vast campus with no vehicle and money of my own, I have to take my husband's help to get anywhere not to mention to buy anything.
4) Identity - No officer bothers about your name to say the least while you have to address them by their ranks and names. You are only Mrs. so-and-so and they should only address you as ma'am always, so no need to know! So easy... It irks me that most women are so as well.
Why have a name at all then? Isn't that one of those things that are yours?? Doesn't it form a part of your identity???
And this is just the beginning! If you want to stay with your husband and you move with him, you would only be Mrs. so-and-so and before you can pick a job, make friends, know to go around yourself, develop your identity, you pack up and move again!
So am I letting all this suck me up? There definitely are bad outbursts but then again I'm working on options to take up and if necessary study further to find a non-tech job that would allow me to go along with my husband, picking up sports hobbies, preparing for competitive exams, putting in a little more effort to connect at a personal level with women around...
Some quirky ideas... Learn to ride my husband's FZ-S, Getting hold of his Debit-Card and... Greet everyone by their names and say Hi! I'm June! every single time no matter how many times we met before until they say... Please, we already know your name!
Do let me know if you have other ideas... :)
Well, there's a lot to catch up... I was getting married in a couple of months when I lost my job to a Business Unit shutdown, then got married and moved to Pune. All too quick that blurred the after-effects of each of these events individually only to kick-in once I kind of settled here.
My first focus was on... ugh no... not on learning to cook but prepare myself for interviews! Only, they never happened. I was unable to find any job opening matching my previous work profile and experience and no single interview call either.
With the new-bride hues and 'I'm married to an Army Man' pride fading, I was desperate to have something on my hands that adds value, brings satisfaction, provide a platform to make a difference and of course put a few rupees into my bank account.
Sure this is a super green, huge campus with so many facilities and sports complexes. You can walk/cycle around, play as many sports you like but hey, these are for helping you stay fit and keep yourself occupied. What I'm missing is something beyond...
The thoughts of moving to different places every 2-3 years, making new friends, find new jobs/ways to keep yourself occupied and feeling worthwhile have been very exciting same time last year.
Ask me now, and I'm battling the following:
1) My Friends - There are many women around, some seniors, some recently wed, few officers and few working. You meet, talk, attend/host parties but any emotional element that I was used to finding in friendships is so visibly absent. They don't cross the line of acquaintances to friends.
2) Sense of Accomplishment - Back then, I woke up each day with a desire to do better at work, meet deadlines, engage in learning new tools, etc. and see results in appraisals, product and all. I was a chip design engineer and when I saw the new chip arrive, knowing you have contributed in its making, which would go into a mobile to be used by someone filled us with so much pride.
3) Independence - Social and Financial Freedom seem bigger things after they ceased to exist. It began way back when I left the auto and started taking bus to school, later trains to and from college and home. I had been a fiercely independent one and thoroughly believed in self-sufficiency. I wasn't reckless but enjoyed my space and ability to glide through everything on my own.
Now in this vast campus with no vehicle and money of my own, I have to take my husband's help to get anywhere not to mention to buy anything.
4) Identity - No officer bothers about your name to say the least while you have to address them by their ranks and names. You are only Mrs. so-and-so and they should only address you as ma'am always, so no need to know! So easy... It irks me that most women are so as well.
Why have a name at all then? Isn't that one of those things that are yours?? Doesn't it form a part of your identity???
And this is just the beginning! If you want to stay with your husband and you move with him, you would only be Mrs. so-and-so and before you can pick a job, make friends, know to go around yourself, develop your identity, you pack up and move again!
So am I letting all this suck me up? There definitely are bad outbursts but then again I'm working on options to take up and if necessary study further to find a non-tech job that would allow me to go along with my husband, picking up sports hobbies, preparing for competitive exams, putting in a little more effort to connect at a personal level with women around...
Some quirky ideas... Learn to ride my husband's FZ-S, Getting hold of his Debit-Card and... Greet everyone by their names and say Hi! I'm June! every single time no matter how many times we met before until they say... Please, we already know your name!
Do let me know if you have other ideas... :)
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